My not-so-new revelation that I like people
I got off Snapchat for 24 hours. Here's what happened.
Hihihiiiii! Happy Sunday!
I’ve got some crackhead energy again today (then again, when do I not)! Too much sugar and too much coffee YAY!
Anyways, this past week, I decided to try something new. It was an impulse that came Wednesday night, and I was going to do it right then and there, but I wanted to wait to see if the impulse would stay. And, it did.
Thursday morning, I woke up, and I was done. I was done with feeling compelled to pick up my phone every five minutes to reply to people. I was done with toxic friends. I was done with dealing with other people’s insecurities 24/7. I was done with trying to look good in every snap I sent. I was just… done.
So, I deleted it. I deleted Snapchat– the app I spent at least 3 hours a day wasting my time on.
I was going to re-download it the following day to keep my streaks, but a one-day cleanse… how would it go? I was curious. Would I miss communicating on it? Would I download it again within a couple hours?
By hour 4, I had a serious case of FOMO.
I’d like to believe my whole life doesn’t exist online now, but it does. It does for all of us. A change that I thought would force me to become more healthy only made me feel less healthy. I must admit, I felt a twinge happier after I completed the whole day; it made me feel like I accomplished something. But, I still felt weirdly lost.
A lot of my friends and I still talked through messages or Instagram even, but without the constant checking-my-phone-for-notifications, it was just strange. For a while, I felt enlightened, as if I had made a huge step in becoming a better version of me. But, another part of me wondered if in becoming a better version of me, I was losing a part of the essence of who I am.
Being social and talking to people online is what I do. My work requires me to do it, and I love doing it. I live and breathe social media and wifi and online graphic design and typing instead of writing. Apps like Snapchat, Instagram, Tik Tok, even my email and Substack – these connect me to the rest of the world. They’re how I make deeper connections and bond with others; they’re how I learn and grow.
Sure, an app like Snapchat can be criticized for its shallow nature of conversations– even I think it’s very toxic for me, or Instagram for cancel culture, or even email for the thousands of emails to sort through. But, I’ve found solace in being able to stay connected with people I barely see nowadays during this pandemic. Not all convos on Snap are shallow; not all parts of Instagram are “cancel culture”-related; not all emails are hard to read or time consuming.
24 hours of no Snapchat wasn’t as life-altering as I had hoped it would be. Then again, I only did it for 24 hours. Maybe if I did it for a week or even a month, I would feel more different.
Bottom line is– I may be scared of talking to people. I may be terrified of seeing my friends IRL again. I may be horrified at the thought of awkward situations because I don’t know what to say. But, at the core, I like people. I like being around friends and family. I like connecting with others and I like learning and growing mutually.
Social media can be toxic. That is an undeniably true fact. However, there are niches within social media, that when found, can be so incredibly beneficial. If you’re thinking about going on a social media cleanse, DO IT. Go for it! One day might’ve not worked for me, but it could work for you.
Would I try it again? Actually, YES, I would. But, I would do it a LOT differently.
Hope y’all enjoyed my random stream of consciousness today! :D
Take care xx
S/O to my cousin, Vaish, for giving me this throwback on Insta.
Some Savvy Life Updates
My life is pretty boring rn, but here you go!
I went on a *socially distanced* picnic on Friday for Senior Ditch Day! Super fun :D and I have another one this Friday (look at me! being all social! impossible!)
I’m still tutoring French for free (if you’re interested hmu! i’m totally down to help out, even one-off q’s!)
IT’S SPRING BREAK! FINALLY!
My sister’s 20th bday is tomorrow !! exciting !! and we’re getting boba !! hype hype
Yesterday, we had an exec meeting for Plannr, and I started laughing for 2 minutes straight on cam… yikes
Watched my first Marvel movie - Captain America, not a huge fan… also yikes
76 days until graduation!!
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